I'm still working on Notes From New Vegas, but in the meantime...

[camwyn]

Ask me about any character I RP or write, and I will pick one of the following and tell you:

(a) Three facts about them from my personal fanon.
(b) Two reasons they're amazing.
(c) Five things that I'd like to see happen to them.
(d) Three people that I might ship that character with and why.
or
(e) If I don't know the character or the fandom, I will make something up.
Original stuff and AUs always okay!


Characters on my RP list include but are not limited to Ray Stantz, Harry Wells, Gordon Freeman, Ellen Park (my version of the Lone Wanderer from Fallout 3), Adrian Shephard, Bumblebee and Ironhide from Transformers 2007, Belar from the Belgariad/Malloreon novels, Vergil from Halo 3 ODST, BLU Medic from Team Fortress 2, Mordin Solus from Mass Effect 2, Arcade Gannon from Fallout New Vegas, possibly Raul Tejada from FNV, possibly Fawkes from Fallout 3, Roger Maxson from the Fallout games, Hektor of Troy, Fa Mulan (folklore rendition, not Disney), Sergeant Preston of the Royal North-West Mounted Police... that's all that come to mind at the moment but if you remember others then go right ahead.

Comments

[duane-kc.livejournal.com]

Ellen Park and Sergeant Preston. (Now *that* would be some odd ship.. :) )

Here's Ellen. Sgt Preston will get done later.

[camwyn]

Ellen, part A.
1. Placed into the chaplain career track on the GOAT exam and was a year away from ordination when she got driven out of the Vault.
2. Does not actually understand the concept of pets. Vault 101 had no animals other than radroach infestations. Either they're food, they're trying to kill her, or they're Jangles the Moon Monkey-types that might as well be people.
3. Prays for anybody she kills, whether they're human or former humans. Does her best to lay the corpses straight, when possible. I think the only exception is that she never said any prayers for the dead of Andale.

Part B.
Amazing thing #1: She's willing to talk to pretty much anybody who isn't actively trying to kill her. This includes robots, mutants, disembodied brains (not that this has come up yet, but this is Fallout, these things happen), sentient mainframes, and people who look like heaps of rotting Brahmin meat. In the Capital Wasteland that's pretty damn amazing.
Amazing thing #2: Aside from a couple of nights when she's just huddled up next to her fire pit and held on to Dogmeat, and one screaming fit after her father died, she hasn't had a nervous breakdown. Given everything that got dumped on her head at an age when most Vault kids would've been going into their job functions full-time and getting married shortly thereafter that's kind of amazing too.

Part C.
- A trip to Point Lookout wherein the gigantic plot-mandated Idiot Ball gets left on the banks of the Potomac before she gets onto the boat. One of the mirelurks can eat it.
- A mission to the far northern city-state of Ronto.
- Returning to Megaton to find that the seeds she got from Oasis established themselves immediately and the area is beginning to green in earnest.
- Acquiring any kind of information about her mother, or about any extended family she may have had.
- Meeting Uncle Leo again.

Part D.
I don't really ship Ellen much with anybody because she kind of gives me a largely asexual vibe. That's not to say that she doesn’t plan on getting married and having children, but that's a question of civic duty, not sex or romance. If things were a mite different, though- Dr. Elliot Tercorien, the Army medic from the Battle of Anchorage that she met on board the alien spaceship; Paladin Kodiak, who was rescued from the Pitt as a baby twenty years ago and serves the Brotherhood in the Lyons Pride now; and... um. Wow. I'm not sure I can think of a third. At one point I'd considered Pek, a Brotherhood of Steel initiate she met in Falls Church, but Pek's a little.... he's not that good at what he does and while he's not *grossly* incompetent or anything, just a raw newb, I just don't think that kind of thing's going to sit well with Ellen. Tercorien is technically two hundred plus years older than Ellen but he spent most of that time in cryo, so he's not likely to be much older than his early thirties. Ellen's 19, but Tercorien's kind of entertaining, knows what he's doing, and has the kind of 'oh god this is horrible- I have to do something' personality that she can appreciate. Paladin Kodiak is a few years older than her- he was rescued from the Pitt twenty years ago, as a child- and he's talkative, intelligent, and skilled enough to be an elite tactical squad's jack of all trades. That kind of thing's bound to lead to really interesting conversations and take matters further along.

Sergeant Preston

[camwyn]

Part A.
1. His full name is Frank William Preston. He almost never uses the Frank part; it was a reference to some relative or other on his mother's side and his parents always called him Bill. (This is because the only first name I heard used in the radio programs, ever, was Bill, but the TV show had him named Frank.)
2. His father was something like 1/4 Native, a result of Sgt. Preston's granddad having emigrated from Scotland without much money to his name and winding up more-or-less marrying his Canadian business partner's daughter; said business partner had a common-law Native wife. The daughter was always able to pass for white, so nobody, including her, ever mentioned the ancestry thing to their son or their grandson.
3. Sometime after the majority of the radio series, he married a Klondike girl who was considerably younger than him. Not that the age difference was anything unusual by local standards. There were, alas, no children- despite considerable effort on their parts- and she, unfortunately, was one of the casualties of the Frank Slide when the two of them were in Alberta in 1903 as he was working on a case.

Part B.
Amazing thing #1: The man is just about as honest as a Yukon summer day is long and yet he's still able to use cunning and tricks to bring people who really deserve it to justice.
Amazing thing #2: He's innately respectful. Not deferential, respectful. Doesn't matter if you're Canadian, American, adult, child, white, Native, or even a sled dog. (Okay, some of the radio episodes had him disabusing superstitious Natives of their belief in magic, but he was equally likely to do that to superstitious whites- and more often than not it was because he saw 'magic' as a cover for criminal activity, rather than 'oh, aren't you silly to believe these things'.)

Part C:
1. I really, really miss the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen stuff that made me pick him up in the first place. I'd love to see him deal with that plot playing out. (I'm not going to write all that myself because I simply cannot voice the other characters.)
2. Some kind of encounter with my favorite pulp-story Mountie, the Silver Corporal, who was the creation of Lester "Doc Savage" Dent.
3. Or, shifting universes, teaming up with a young prospector named Scrooge McDuck to take down some shifty characters in the Klondike gold fields.
4. LET'S SHIFT UNIVERSES AGAIN. I once did a Starship Troopers version of him where he and King were part of the Terran military; he was a Lieutenant because you're automatically an officer if you get accepted to work with a neodog. I'd like to see some events of the Starship Troopers universe unfolding with those two.
5. And not so much universe shifting as maybe time jumping or something, but I've had the image of a Mountie with really extraordinary legal status chasing down some kind of drug ring in the back of my head for some time; the image involves a rocket launcher, a helicopter, and the title "Sergeant Preston and the Golden Triangle", so... yeah.

Part D.
1. Louise Delaney, the woman I mentioned him marrying in part A. Then again, I created her with the intent of making her someone he'd at least find worthwhile, so I'm biased.
2. A somewhat older and more mature League of Extraordinary Gentlemen-universe Dorothy Gale.
3. As with Ellen, I'm a bit stuck for a third option. There are very few recurring characters other than Preston and his dog King in-universe, and out-of-universe there were two female characters in the League crew, and the other one is Mary "Jesus God the one in the books is more terrifying than the Disney one" Poppins, so that's not it. However, I can say that the episode "How Preston Got King" presented what sounded like a letter-perfect case of lifebonding at first sight when Preston picked up that puppy. Not a romantic or sexual ship, but one hell of an emotional one there. (Which is part of why I could see the Starship Troopers case; the recruiter in the book at one point looks at Johnny Rico's test results and asks him if he could ever imagine being married to a dog, because that's how very closely bound the K9 officers and the neodogs are. Like that.)

[antepathy.livejournal.com]

I'm going to say...Ironhide. :D

Ironhide

[camwyn]

First things first: the only canon for 'hide I'm using is the 2007 movie. I have not read any of the comics, I could not get very far into Ghosts of Yesterday, and I refuse to admit that Revenge of the Fallen exists.

Part A, personal canon:
1. Cybertronians of his universe, in my headcanon, are incepted with a particular purpose and function in mind and are entered into a cohort of mechs with approximately the same sort of function. Works as something like a family, something like a military unit. Ironhide in my headcanon was originally incepted into a construction cohort; he worked on bridges a lot when he was a younger mech.
2. Ironhide, like all Cybertronians in my headcanon, came online as a full adult with all the data in his storage that he would need to do his job. Like other Cybertronians he had a particular mentor/parental figure from his cohort. His mentor was Kup, the oldest and most cynical mech on Cybertron.
3. The Cybertronians of this universe in my headcanon have a three-day commemoration of the day the Allspark first landed on the lump of lifeless rock that would become Cybertron; they call it Cubefall. It's considered an extremely auspicious time to change functions if you absolutely, positively feel you want to leave your old one behind. Somewhere along the way Ironhide grew highly suspicious of Lord High Protector Megatron's political/military intentions and one Cubefall he changed his function from construction to defense and got a lot of upgrades in anticipation of the day when things would go horribly wrong. This is what happens when you grow up with Kup; you learn to anticipate the worst.

Part B- The Amazing
1. Dude is old, man, old as they come, and he can still tie your skidplates together behind your ears without batting an optic shutter. I have a weakness for badass old folk.
2. I will admit Revenge of the Fallen exists long enough to say that possibly the most awesome thing I have seen him do is answer Ratchet's suggestion that they leave Earth with, "That's not what Optimus would want." Given how he seems to feel about most squishies other than maybe the Lennoxes and possibly Sam, putting his own feelings aside to carry on for Optimus... that's pretty damn amazing.

Part C- Things I Would Like To See Happen To Him
1. A sequel that doesn't stink worse than the Arthur Kill landfill in Staten Island, with him in it
2. Any kind of extended interaction with the Lennoxes, just getting used to humans
3. "So what's this data disc you're giving me, person from another universe? Transformers: The Movie? Says it's from 1986? All right, I'll watch it..."
4. Some kind of really bizarre dimensional accident resulting in accidental time travel, in which he finds himself stuck somewhere medieval at best and has to decide whether to attempt to uplift their tech level to keep himself going or just go into stasis lock and hope for the best
5. I really, really, really want him to get invited to a Japanese robotics convention as a guest of honor, because not everybody in the world is going to be looking at space alien robots the same way

Part D- The Shipping
1. I don't know how the movie version of Chromia is, but I liked her enough in the original cartoon that I'm willing to ship him with movie Chromia.
2. Optimus. He is dedicated to that mech on levels that I'm not sure humans can understand. I don't know if anything romantic would ever come out of it, but those two have one hell of a bond already and I couldn't see Ironhide without him.
3. I could see something in the way of a casual ship between him and Ratchet.

[chanter1944]

Hmmm. Tell me about Adrian?

[camwyn]

Part A- The Headcanon

1. He was born and raised in Rowlesburg, West Virginia. He was introduced to hunting and fishing and surviving in the woods at an early age and pretty much grew up with a gun in his hand and an eye for every little detail in his environment that might potentially be of use or interest.
2. He joined the Marines not long after he got his high school diploma. While in the Corps he was selected for the Scout Sniper Program. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scout_Sniper) He was selected for the Hazardous Environment Combat Unit after that.
3. As a result of Conversations With Dead People 2009, he carries in his head the names, death dates, and death locations of every single member of the United States Marine Corps who died as a result of Black Mesa, the subsequent Xen invasions, or the Combine. He's not sure how he remembers all this. He tries not to think about it much because that leads straight into depression and worse, but he's pretty sure he'll be carrying that info with him for the rest of his life or until a living Corps is reestablished and a memorial created. He does not talk about this information with other people. They'd just tell him to let it go.

Part B- The Amazing.

1. In-canon: Never mind all the combat he had to live through, although that's a pretty impressive feat in itself. In-canon, the man was twenty-two years old and basically trained for infantry and sniper work and got told, with no warning and no preparation at all, "Here's a nuke. Disarm it." And pulled it off without accidentally glassing himself and everyone around him.
2. Out-of-canon: He's 22 going on 23, according to the information we get at the start of Opposing Force. At an age when other Americans are looking for jobs or applying to grad school, he's bound and determined to re-establish the Marine Corps as soon as the Combine are driven off and there's an America again to restore it for. Or at least to establish the Corps to protect the people around him whether or not the country is re-established, since he doesn't trust human nature enough to think that once the Combine are gone humans and Vortigaunts can just stand down and everybody be unified. People will be dicks, history has borne that out a thousand thousand times. He needs to give his people, human or otherwise, a service to protect them against that.

Part C- Things I Would Like To See Happen To Him
1. I'd like him to get into a battle where he has to kill several Combine Elites, and discover afterwards that one of them used to be a Marine. I'm not sure how he'd do this since the Combine bleaches your skin when they synth you up, so identifying marks and tattoos are out, but still.
2. I'd like some kind of combat mission that results in the loss of one of his hands. This will disturb him at first, and then he will find out about Adrian Carton de Wiart and what he did after a similar injury, and he will become the absolute terror of rehab and/or Milliways as he gets himself back up to speed.
3. I want to see him dealing with small children after the Combine are gone. He used to play with his siblings' kids regularly and some of his buddies at Santego had kids, and he likes them in general. Thanks to his suspended animation, he's actually handled and dealt with children more recently than anyone else in his world, and I want to make use of that fact.
4. I want to see him up to his eyeballs in combat in the Combine overworld. Since he's not ever going to get to put a wrench between the G-Man's eyes, bringing the hurt to the maggots will just have to do.
5. It's probably pretty obvious that I want to see him re-establish the Marines somehow, so I'll skip that and say that I want him to wind up taming several other houndeyes besides Mrs. Wilson, because the image of him pointing to something or someone extremely dangerous and cheerfully drawling, "Sic 'em, girls" right before they all let off their sonic attacks is kind of appealing.

Part D- The Shipping
1. Eleanor Freeman, Gordon's niece, as established at Milliways.
2. ... look, can we just agree that the shipping section of this meme is the one I'm worst at and be on my way? Because I have a really hard time with these.

[zwol.livejournal.com]

... Mordin. Or Vergil.

Vergil

[camwyn]

As I don't actually have much headcanon for Mordin yet- I'm still working on it- I'm gonna go for Vergil.

Part A- The Headcanon
1. Huragok are named by their parents based on phenomena observed during construction (they're built, not born). A canonical example is Lighter Than Some, from the Halo novel Contact Harvest. Vergil's Huragok name is Weighted Forward, because he is.
2. Vergil understands spoken languages and can theoretically reproduce speech using computer interfaces, but finds the use of spoken words to be counterintuitive. This is why in most RP situations Vergil will use an Etch-a-Sketch to produce images, or a video communicator to produce text, rather than simply coaxing a computer to speak.
3. After the events of Halo 3 ODST and Halo 3, Vergil was kept on board a UNSC vessel in protective custody. The Covenant War might've been over, but repatriating a defector is seldom a good idea, and simply letting Vergil loose on a deep space facility or on Earth was out of the question. Vergil currently lives on board the UNSC heavy cruiser Spark In Darkness.

Part B- The Amazing
1. A member of a pacifist species with only marginal natural defenses (their energy shields) and no combat capabilities beyond the ability to hijack machines, Vergil nevertheless got up the guts to attempt an escape from slavery deep inside a war zone on an alien planet.
2. The ODSTs in New Mombasa blew up a massive number of Huragok during their attempts to save the city. Vergil forgave them, if the cutscene with Sergeant Johnson is anything to go by. Not the ODSTs in general. The specific ones he was with in the final cutscene. Forgiveness is always amazing.

Part C. Things I'd like to see happen to Vergil
1. I'd like Vergil to find a place where he properly belongs instead of just hovering around as a potentially problematic defector in UNSC hands. This already happened at Axiom Nexus, where Vergil's opted to live in a city populated almost entirely by giant robots; what Huragok would pass up the opportunity to work with that many ancient machines?
2. I wanna see Vergil have to save somebody's life in combat by deploying the energy shield for the first time.
3. I wanna see Vergil have to take over some kind of massive machine or computer system in order to prevent a disaster from happening.
4. I wouldn't mind seeing Vergil meet up with Sergeant Johnson again, somewhere.
5. Having Vergil encounter Covenant members again- either from before or after the war ended- would be cool.

Part D- The Shipping
No. I don't. Seriously, I don't ship Vergil with anybody.

[minkhollow]

::picks the Medic::

BLU Medic

[camwyn]

Part A- The Headcanon

1. His parents died when he was very young and he and his two younger siblings were raised by his grandparents. At one point the family almost got moved to Berlin from Stuttgart, but this never happened, which turned out to be something of a dodged bullet.
2. He attended a pretty good medical school and developed a rival on his first day there. The reason there is no proof of his degree is because both he and his rival attempted to ruin the other's lives by committing surreptitious vandalism on the school's archival wing and inadvertently reenacted the Reichstag Fire.
3. He's been married. And divorced. His wife initiated the divorce when she caught him in bed with the BLU Sniper of the time. Medic was a clever enough fellow with enough resources at his disposal to wind up turning the case around and having her declared at fault for the whole thing. She has vowed revenge and regularly gets it, because after they parted ways she signed on with RED and works as one of their Pyros.

Part B, The Amazing
1. He never, never, ever gets tired of his work. Oh, he'll bitch about his fellow BLUs being overly demanding or annoying, and sometimes he'll sew somebody's legs on backwards to teach them a lesson about not calling for help when they don't specifically need it, but really, he adores his job and wouldn't give it up for the world.
2. He really is a bastard. If you're not on BLU's team, the only reason he'll bother to do anything medical for you is if it's either a challenge that intrigues him, or a bad situation that could inconvenience him should it continue. He has exactly two soft spots in his heart, one for small children and the other for his pet guinea pig Katyusha. Everyone else's problems and issues are measured according to how they affect him. There's just no nice in there, and that's kind of awesome.

Part C. Things I'd like to see happen

1. I do want to go through with the plot of Cata having an encounter with Medic's ex-wife during a TF2 plot or similar situation.
2. He's been fascinated by transplant surgery ever since he met the Kingdom Hearts crew. One day I want him to attempt an organ transplant off the battlefield. Just to say he did it.
3. He has never yet punched anyone in the teeth for calling him a Nazi, although he came really close when he and Cata were ambushed by the off-duty RED Soldier. I'd kind of like him to get that chance.
4. I'm not normally interested in anything zombielicious, but it'd be interesting to see him stuck in a situation where he had to be medical support for his team during a zombie apocalypse. I mean, the respawners are one thing but the walking dead are really damn disturbing to someone like him, whose life's ambition is to bitchslap Death.
5. Come to think of it, dropping in a war zone without the BLU team or anyone else who knew him would make things interesting as well. Pity we don't have the Stone Angels around any more.

Part D- the shipping
1. Cata, for one thing. Assassins are hot!
2. As I indicated in the headcanon section, there was at least one team Sniper in his past that I could easily ship him with. In his experience Snipers tend to be the most intelligent and least disturbing members of the team. Engineers are kind of weird; it's that evil laugh they all seem to have that turns him off.
3. If Demo ever sobered up, possibly. Not Heavy, though. He's fond of the guy and works closely with him more often than not, but Heavy's just not his type.

[mmexlibris]

Arcade Gannon

Arcade Gannon

[camwyn]

Part A- The Headcanon

1. Arcade has a fondness for attempting to decipher the half-legible bits of badly burned or damaged prewar books in his spare time. You never know when you're going to find something that might be useful to unearthing the whole text.
2. His most recent relationship was about three years ago, not long after he started working in Freeside. It did not last long, mostly because the other man insisted on dragging Arcade along on visits to the Strip, an area of Vegas which Arcade intensely dislikes.
3. He's rather fond of board games, most of which he tends to play against himself. He's currently engaged in a play-by-post game of chess with the King (the leader of the Freeside gang of Elvis impersonators known as, unsurprisingly enough, the Kings), as the King lost his temper when he brought his dog to the Followers for medical treatment and no longer feels entirely comfortable visiting the place in person.

Part B, The Amazing
1. For someone who mostly works as a medical researcher and isn't particularly aggressive or combative personality-wise, the fact that he never seems to complain about having to protect himself or his companions when things get bag is kind of amazing. It's all too easy for people in his situation to start complaining about the giant scorpions and the road conditions and the crazy group leader who insists on exploring every half-hidden cave full of deathclaws, but he never does.
2. He learns from his mistakes. At one point he tells the Courier that "There've been some good men along the way, but lovers make bad confidantes"; I get the very clear impression from him that he only has to have bad things happen once before he realizes what he did and what he'd better not do again.

Part C, things I'd like to see happen:
1. I really want him to meet Alyx and some of the other people who've been exposed to the Fallout universe via Ellen or Sativa or Weasel. Just for the contrast of experience.
2. I want to see his reaction to a prewar type of setting, whether it's his world or some other Millipatron's or just the general undamaged-ness of Milliways itself. I suspect there will be bitterness, but you never know.
3. I want someone to have to remind him to eat because he's discovered an intact library somewhere and forgot about anything else other than studying what was there.
4. I haven't played him long enough to have a full 5 yet, but I do know that I want his New Vegas story to have a happy ending. It is very, very, very easy for things to go badly for Arcade in-game.

People I ship him with:

A, haven't played him long enough to have come up with any, and b, he doesn't give me the vibe of looking for anyone so I haven't tried yet either. I do get the feeling that he's really choosy and tends to put that kind of thing on the back burner because there's so much else that's more important.

[derien.livejournal.com]

Ray Stanz and Sergeant Preston. :D (Ok, ok, that can be 'or' rather than 'and.' I like my brain going there, but that's all about my version of Ray, where he's sweet but not exactly innocent.)

[vincentursus.livejournal.com]

Vimes please.

[mm-spinelstar.livejournal.com]

Bumblebee? :3

[purplekitte.livejournal.com]

I must say I'm curious about your take on Fa Mulan.

[leeshajoy.livejournal.com]

Not to seem too predictable, but... Gordon.

Gordon Freeman

[camwyn]

Part A, the headcanon

1. Gordon doesn't know what he's going to do with himself once the Combine are gone, other than raising his kids. Twenty years is a long time to be out of science and have to catch up; Alyx's reassurances to the contrary he thinks everyone in the world who has any kind of scientific education is going to be ahead of him. He's never been cut out for politics, because that requires dealing with people. About the only thing he sees himself as being good at any more is fighting, and he doesn't want to do that for the rest of his life... but he really doesn't know what else he's going to be any good for, or what you do with war heroes once the war is over and the politicians take the lead.
2. He regrets a lot of the people he's lost along the way, but he's never quite been able to mourn or regret the loss of his father. Bill Freeman was around, but he and Gordon had been growing apart for a very long time, mostly because Bill probably really wasn't cut out to be a father in the first place. Gordon hasn't bothered asking the people they rescued from Seattle about his father's fate, but he's asked a few about his mother and brother. It just... doesn't matter the same way.
3. Gordon still has trouble sleeping more than three or four hours at a stretch. He has a better chance of sleeping longer when he's in bed with Alyx, but most nights he tends to snap awake at some point and have to lie very still for a while to sort himself out before attempting to sleep again. He's taken to compensating for this with brief naps during the day a la Thomas Edison.

Part B- The Amazing
1. A brief teenage fascination with Ayn Rand aside, Gordon has come to understand how very important it is to give other people something to hold on to. Even when he wants to just put his head between his knees and hyperventilate until all the bad stuff goes away, he's aware that people are depending on him, and so he goes on. He'll complain about it eventually, but he's aware that the universe doesn't care whether he's happy or not, so he'd better just do what's important and save the complaining for later. The degree to which he's capable of doing this is pretty evident, and pretty amazing, in the games.
2. The rate at which he learns and adapts is pretty damn amazing. In canon this mostly means a geek whose entire experience with guns is a few months' practice at the Black Mesa test range suddenly learns how to use every single weapon he can get his hands on. Out of canon, in RP, it's been his rate of adaptation to the completely screwed-up wreck his world's become, to his situation in it, to the absolute weirdness of Milliways- he goes quiet and he watches and listens and then he deals with it. Not a lot of people can do that.

Part C- things I'd like to see happen to him
1. I want to see him wreck the Combine overworld so thoroughly that not one stone is left standing on top of another.
2. I want him to look the G-Man in the eye and tell ol' Greyface, "I don't know. You choose," thereby calling the G-Man's bluff.
3. I want him to get to meet his children even if he's only got one eye and a lot of scar tissue at the time.
4. I want him to laugh in the face of someone who looks at his track record since arriving in City 17 and accuses him of deliberately engineering his current situation for power/prestige/position's sake, because it could not be farther from the truth.
5. Years down the line I want him to demonstrate to someone a generation or two younger than him that yes, the old guy with the eyepatch and the cane is in fact still Freeman the Destroyer, and will be up until the day he dies.

Part D- the shipping
1. Alyx. Full stop.

I had at one point vaguely considered the possibility of Chell, but that was before actually RPing with her.

[aberrantangels]

I'm going to be mean clever and, even though you don't RP him anymore, say Detritus.