(no subject)

[camwyn]

Sentences in Watchmen fic that should not ever exist:

“I’m the Comedian,” my future best friend stuck out his hand.

The speaker is a sixteen year old girl.

Comments

[daniidebrabant.livejournal.com]

....OW.

ETA: Someone passed me this (http://www.cracked.com/blog/rorschachs-journal-another-boring-night/). And ...was that from a Mary Sue sporking comm?

[hortorum.livejournal.com]

And no-one ever found Mary Sue's body...

[camwyn]

Yeah, it was, thank God. If I'd hit that unadulterated... well, I'll let the Master speak for me.

[camwyn]

Mary Sues make the baby Ozymandias say 'ah, fuck it, nuclear war works for me'!

[moonlup.livejournal.com]

I've neither seen nor read Watchmen, but even I know that is just plain wrong.

[sophistry]

 

[lilpocketninja.livejournal.com]

And people wonder why the concept of Watchmen fanfiction disturbs me so damn much.

[lienne.livejournal.com]

...

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

If the Comedian were in character at all I would say that wouldn't going to end well at all.

[whisper2ascream.livejournal.com]

....Did they see the same movie as everybody else? Or if this a REALLY confused Twilight fan?

[camwyn]

There's only one chapter so far. He's referred to as 'mustache guy' and he smiles happily when the Sue shakes his hand with a stronger grip than he expected. Also, his biceps are larger around than her waist.

[camwyn]

The night Laurie and I met, we went out on patrol with each other and tried to figure out a decent name for me. Neither of us were very good at it, until she asked me the question “what do you stand for?”. I said I stood for justice, honor, and glory, like all of us.

Then she said Summer Glory and that was my name.

[camwyn]

When our hands dropped I looked over at the ink blot man and stepped towards him too. I looked up at him. He wasn’t very tall, I’m just kind of short. I knew he was looking at me too. I could feel his eyes burning a hole through mine. “That’s Rorschach,” Nite Owl said.

“Pleasure,” Rorschach said to me, his voice raspy and focused.


... ahahahaha no.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

... wait, what? How does that fit?

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

That's one damn skinny Sue.

Do you have a linky?

[camwyn]

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5014535/1/Candys_Glory

Roll 1d10 for SAN loss.

[laughingacademy.livejournal.com]

...Ow. It’s too early in the day for convulsions.

[camwyn]

She treats Ozymandias like a Marauder-era Sue treats Peter Pettigrew, too, I might note. 'Oh look it's the gay guy NEXT INTERESTING PRETTY PERSON PLEASE'.

[camwyn]

I'd say it could be worse, but then I'd have to think about the 'Rorschach's girlfriend' class of fanfic and I really don't want to.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

Wow... just... wow.. and wow... I'm gonna go cry in the corner now.

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

I thought Ozzy was much prettier than the Comedian. Besides, couldn't she turn him straight?

Finally, Rorschach would not in any way say "Pleasure" to her.

[lienne.livejournal.com]

OH BOY.

[camwyn]

She has a Joker's girlfriend story, too.

The only reason I'm not headwalling is because I spend some time every day wading in this kind of stuff to build immunity.

[camwyn]

All I can hope is that one day, the critical mass of these things manages to summon a giant psychic manifestation of Alan Moore's wrath...

[kippurbird.livejournal.com]

I don't understand those people. Honestly.

I've been reading Brisingr... which is just as bad if not worse at times. The unintended homoeroticism is fantastic.

Why do you go reading this stuff?