(no subject)

[camwyn]

Since I've got one entry left to write for Half-Life 2 and then it's on to the Episodes, I thought I should gather all the back material I've got so far here. Clicking the entry tags is all very nice but sometimes it's just easiest for me to have the links in one place.

Half-Life write-ups, aka the Homicidal Evil Space Chicken Reports:

Part 1: Knight of the First Crusade
Part 2: TENTACLES WHUT
Part 3: "Whoever wrote this episode should DIE!!!"
Part 4: Ho Ho Ho, Now I Has A Rocket Launcher
Part 5: The Final Apocalyptic Battle Of- Oh Hell, I Lived
Part 6: TESTICLE MONSTER. WTF.
Part 6a: An Interlude Upon The PS2
Part 7: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

Half-Life 2 write-ups:

Part 1: WELCOME TO NEWARK
Part 2: WHOA WHOA WHOA NOT THE BATMAN
Part 3: NOT YOUR GODDAMN KWISATZ HADERACH
Part 4: STUPID CHOPPER, YOU GO SQUISH NOW
Part 5: RAVENHOLDM. U SUDNT COME HERE. With bonus links to the opus of Squirrelking!
Part 6: COME BACK WITH MY CAR
Part 7: BUGS BUGS BUGS IT'S ALL BUGS
Part 8: ATTACK OF THE TOCKLAFANE
Part 9: WELCOME BACK TO NEWARK
Part 10: MAKE THE SPIDERS GO AWAY

I should have part 11 done tonight, and then after that there'll be write-ups for Episodes 1 and 2. I do, however, have a question. I bought an Xbox 360 specifically so I could play other video games without having to upgrade my PC. Right now I have three games in the queue, and I’m debating which one to go after next. Are people interested in more game write-ups?

[Poll #1223746]

Let me know. Thanks!

Comments

[aberrantangels]

Bioshock, because even if you're Yun-Fat Chow, the moment you're compared to a magical hand that shoots bees, you're going to f*cking lose.

[camwyn]

I have all three of the listed games. Bioshock is really pretty much the reason I bought an Xbox in the first place. Stranglehold was a birthday present from mephron. Prince of Persia I got at a used videogame store when I was on vacation this past week.

Whatever game I happen to be playing when October rolls around is getting arbitrarily set aside in favour of Ghostbusters, though. I have it on reserve at my local Gamestop.

[leeshajoy.livejournal.com]

Whatever game I happen to be playing when October rolls around is getting arbitrarily set aside in favour of Ghostbusters, though. I have it on reserve at my local Gamestop.

Please tell me you'll be doing a write-up of that. :D

[leeshajoy.livejournal.com]

Addendum: Preferably in narrative style from Ray Stantz's point of view. ;)

[camwyn]

'course I will. It's in the rules.

As for who tells the story, it's going to depend on whether I get more entertainment out of 'Ray dealing with the events of the game' or, since I"m told this is an FPS where you play someone on their first day at GB headquarters, 'Clueless Noob deals with the events of the game', really.

[daniidebrabant.livejournal.com]

...is it sad that I picked PoP just because I want to hear the screaming and the cursing?

[camwyn]

Hee. Well, it's not particularly surprising, I"ll give it that.

[sylveraven.livejournal.com]

I'm with Danii. I think Prince of Persia's gonna be the most fun for us to watch, if nothing else.

[mephron]

I picked Stranglehold.

Well, because.

[camwyn]

I expected nothing less. Myself, I stayed out of the voting as best I could; I didn't want to come off biased.

[sophistry]

PRINCE OF PERSIA. "Look, because we said so, okay? Now go backflip off that wall and stab those guards in bullet-time before we change our minds and make you dead again."

[camwyn]

The original Prince of Persia was one of my very few attempts at actual action gaming on my computer at college. I had a 386SX-25 with four megs of RAM; it ran Civilization very well, and Castle Wolfenstein sort of okay, and Doom... the less said, the better. Oh, and Dune, the first video game, ran well, and Dune 2, the RTS game did too- but Prince of Persia has a spot in my heart because of trying to fumble my way through it for a good chunk of freshling year.

The Prince's skulls take up almost as much space as Mario's and Luigi's in the Valley of the Dead Marios, I can tell you that right now.

[pat-trick.livejournal.com]

bioshock. because the game begs for an in-character's-head narrative.

[lwood.livejournal.com]

Nonono, you should buy/run/beat Portal next!

-- Lorrie

[camwyn]

Oh, I've got Portal. I bought the Orange Box to get Portal. It happened to come with Half-Life 2 and both the Episodes. I got to... mmm... one or two test chambers before the end and decided I was getting frustrated, so I'd try something else and downloaded the original Half-Life from Valve's online store.

I might consider playing through Portal at some point under the assumption that the character is not an unidentified young vaguely Asiatic-looking woman, but is in fact a somewhat elderly and overly clever woman like Miss Marple. The image of a dotty old Englishwoman suddenly dropping the dotty facade and very firmly telling GLaDOS that she is in for quite the drubbing after all the trouble she's put people through is far more entertaining.

[cameoflage.livejournal.com]

Bioshock. I have no suitably objective reason for this; it's just that I've never heard of Stranglehold and have no real opinion on or knowledge of Prince of Persia, so Bioshock wins by default. (I haven't actually played it myself, although I'd like to at some point.)

Also, while I'm very much enjoying the Half-Life 2 writeups, I would quite like some deviled eggs as well.

[camwyn]

Stranglehold is basically a John Woo movie, only it's a videogame. You control the Chow Yun-Fat character, Tequila. It's a sequel to the movie Hard-Boiled, which is of the genre where film noir meets "wouldn't it be awesome if we had a twenty-minute long gunfight in a hospital?" on a regular basis. And I absolutely adore John Woo movies (and Chow Yun-Fat), so if Stranglehold doesn't win, I'm most likely going to play through that whenever the winner frustrates me too much.

[cameoflage.livejournal.com]

Ooh, nifty. Sounds like fun.

[batyatoon]

I kinda (kinda) want to see Prince of Persia solely because it's a game that appeared in Life (the TV show, not the magazine), but not strongly enough to vote for it.

I absolutely want to see more game writeups. Because they make me laugh. Rather a lot actually.

[camwyn]

I think I'm going to call this feature "Camwyn Stinks At Video Games". Because I do, and modesty is really the best course of action when dealing with this kind of thing.

[midnightlurker.livejournal.com]

Bioshock. Because any chance to deconstruct/criticize/insult Objectivism should be taken. :)

[lccorp2.livejournal.com]

How about doing episodes one and two, if you have them?

[camwyn]

Oh, they're next. I said as much in the post. I just wanted to know what game would be best to start next, since I've already played both the Episodes and it seems a shame to leave my Xbox idle.

[lccorp2.livejournal.com]

oh, silly me. wasn't reading closely.

How about doing Portal, then? :d

[camwyn]

Might do. Depends on if I can get it up to finish the game; I'm really close to the end, so it shouldn't take long, and I"m better at the control scheme now.

[leeshajoy.livejournal.com]

You're aware that the last test chamber is more like the 2/3 mark than the end, right?

[camwyn]

Yeah, Sherri beat the game. My definition of really close is 'two nights' worth of play' most of the time.

[bigscary.livejournal.com]

Prince of Persia, for the very-similar-to-Gordon THIS IS A VERY BAD DAY, I HATE THE ARCHITECTS, NO REALLY, FUCK WHOEVER BUILT THIS PLACE vibe.

[lccorp2.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm not sure if you've watched this:

"Half-life in 60 seconds".

http://youtube.com/watch?v=slRsexrhbG8

[camwyn]

Yep! Danii pointed me at it a while ago. Much snickering.