where are your gloves and your helmet?

Ah, see, I had assumed that British usage of 'kebab' meant what the Greeks call 'souvlaki'- ie, chunks of meat onna stick. Greek souvlaki is marinated lamb or mutton with spices and sauce and lemon juice, but people who aren't Greek tend to refer to anything on a stick as shish kebab, unless it's satay. Which is annoying because shish kebab is Turkish in origin and Greece and Turkey are sort of hereditary enemies.