(no subject)

[camwyn]

Marital Aid or Dog Toy?

I got 12 out of 14 right on the warm-up round, 11 out of 14 on the difficult round, and 8 out of 10 or 11 on the user-suggested round.

As I have not actually had experience with marital aids beyond the occasional bit of gawping at sale offers online, all I can really say is: I know my dog toys.

Comments

[thekit.livejournal.com]

this is hard. nearly everything looks like a bone.

[camwyn]

Yeah, but there are a few tip-offs that it's more likely to be a dog toy:

1. Does it look like a turd? I mean, seriously, does it really, really look like a turd? That's one of the unfortunate aspects of the Kong line of dog toys. They look like turds. Not even most of the butt-plugs I've seen advertised on the web look like they really belong in a butt. If it looks like that, it's probably a dog toy.

2. If it's got a rounded end visible, is that end more bullet-shaped or two-headed? Very few dog toys seem to have bullet-shaped heads; they sort of have the two-headed action going on in imitation of bones.

3. Does it have a very skinny section that looks like your average beagle could chomp it in half? Probably not a dog toy then.

4. Has it got three or more limbs coming off a single center? Probably meant for either tug-of-war with the dog or playing fetch, as most marital aids seem to be designed for at most two people.

5. Does it look fuzzy? Unless it's a pair of handcuffs it's probably a dog toy.

[feonixrift.livejournal.com]

The thing that really gets me about this one... "marital aid"? wtf? They're sex toys!

[quintus.livejournal.com]

It's a lovely old euphamism. :-)

[feonixrift.livejournal.com]

Indeed. The layers of implication are quite well arranged.

[kali921.livejournal.com]

13 out of 14 first round.

14 out of 14 on the difficult round.

9 out of 11 on the user round.

And sadly - I own every single one of those dog toys and not one of the "marital aids."

But my Africa is happy.

[crispengray.livejournal.com]

As long as you've been using the dog toys as directed, and not getting the directions confused.

[kali921.livejournal.com]

I'll do my best to confine my shopping for marital aids to Good Vibrations! But on the other hand, if something from GV makes a really good chew toy......

[lizzyrose89.livejournal.com]

11/14 on 1st
10/14 2nd
10/10 user
Heh heh!