And people wonder why I grind my teeth sometimes.

Morning radio show today, a Top 40 station in NYC. DJs chattering about traveling overseas safely. Topic of passing as a Canadian came up. All the usual reasons - nobody hates Canadians, Canadians never give anybody trouble, reputations for politeness, etc.

DJ 1: So say you're from Toronto! Hey, [DJ 2], let's say you were over in - I dunno, Pakistan - visiting family.
DJ 2: Yeah...
DJ 1: Say you wanted to go out and walk around the city or something, you know, not with your family. Say you just wanted to see the country, and you wanted people to think you were a Canadian so they wouldn't give you any trouble.
DJ 2: Right...
DJ 3: (general laughter)
DJ 1: What would you do? I mean, to make people think you were a Canadian?
DJ 2: *thinks* Well, I'd carry around a can of maple syrup, and I'd probably say CLICK-

CLICK is the point where I changed the station. I did not want to hear it. I brushed past the station a few moments later and DJ's 3 and 1 were trying to convince DJ 2 that wearing a Canadian sports jersey would be a lot better than wearing a New York sports jersey and explaining that Canadians like New York sports too.

Jeebus. mtr1966, mountainspeak, anybody else Canadian on my friends list or otherwise reading this - I'm really sorry. Let me send you these guys. I'll take three cranky Francophones of your choice in exchange.

I need some help/advice here, please?

Hi, folks. Some of you may already know that I have a penpal in Wuhan, a major industrial city in mainland China. We exchanged calendars a while back as gifts. Recently he sent me this book: Things Chinese, by Du Feibao and Du Bai, published by the China Travel & Tourism Press. It's absolutely marvellous as far as I'm concerned - covers all kinds of cultural things that foreigners wouldn't necessarily know about or even think to research until they actually saw it. I'm just up to the second chapter, which covers architecture.

I'd like to reciprocate if at all possible, but when I go to the bookstore I find myself staring at the shelves and wondering if anyone ever bothered to put together a Big Book of Things You Might Like To Know About America for anyone over the age of eight. The tour guides don't really work, because even the DK ones full of photographs are more intended for people planning to come and visit, rather than people who just want to know. I'd prefer to find something with a lot of pictures and a relatively low amount of politics, if at all possible. Mind, this is going to be hard. Countries that get founded, instead of just sort of growing up around a given cultural nucleus, have a lot of politics in their histories. I just want the book to actually get through the mail inspectors and not get him in trouble.

Any suggestions?