The tote bag is good, or the buttons. There's a website that sells little aluminum squares about twice as tall as a credit card with the Bill of Rights printed on them; I have some around here somewhere, and can look up the URL if you're interested.

I can't countenance persecuting the poor cops who are tasked with enforcing a misguided and unConstitutional policy, though. Someone else will undoubtedly play churlish tricks with Play-Doh and spiders; you needn't.